The six emotional stages of divorce are the most common feelings you might experience when your marriage does not work. When you and your partner lose the will to mend your broken marriage, you tend to resort to a divorce. It is an unavoidable stage in the life of both partners. There is nothing that both parties can do about it but handle the situation. If you need a divorce lawyer in Klang Valley, you can contact us at thedivorcelawyermalaysia.com for divorce law consultation.
Dealing with divorce can take you on a rollercoaster of emotions. It can be overwhelming and might take a toll on you. So, knowing the six emotional stages will help you deal with them in a healthy way.
Reasons Why You Experience Grief in Divorce
People have their ways of dealing with their emotions. Most would experience the six (6) stages of grief by Kubler Ross. Going through a divorce may give you a feeling of losing someone. And that kind of feeling is valid since you lost someone, which is your partner. Aside from that, there are other reasons why you suffer from grief. Here are some of those reasons:
Still in Love With Your Partner
Losing someone that you are still in love with can be one of the hardest things a person should deal with. Letting go of your partner when you are still in love with them will never be an easy process. Especially when you have become accustomed to being with them.
Too Dependent On Your Partner
During your marriage, you might have relied too much on your partner during adversities. That physical and emotional intimacy you had with your partner will suddenly end with divorce. Dealing with divorce becomes a challenge. Especially when you have built a strong attachment to your partner. And this may cause difficulties and separation anxiety during your divorce.
Sudden Life Changes
Sudden changes in your routine or lifestyle might be new to you. And not being able to do the things you are used to doing might make you feel like an alien to your own life. Starting a new routine can be difficult when you are moving on. It is unavoidable that you will still look for things you are accustomed to.
The Six Emotional Stages of Divorce
Knowing the reasons for your grief will help you deal with your situation better. And to make your moving on process easier, you have to be familiar with the emotions of grief. Here are the six emotional states of divorce that you will be experiencing.
Being aware that your marriage is ending might send a tinge of panic in your system. Realizing that you will be separated from your partner can be nerve-wrecking. You might feel anxious knowing that after your marriage ends, you would have to deal with things on your own. The chances of living your life alone may awaken your fear. But you need to remember that your fear is temporary.
You might have a hard time accepting the fact that your marriage did not work. There are instances where you may ditch the idea of accepting the truth about your divorce. During the denial phase, you might do something to make your partner stop the divorce. You might proceed with doing your normal routine as if nothing is happening. Keep in mind that this is your normal response as a coping mechanism. But, do not dwell in this phase too long.
The next emotional stage of divorce is anger. It is at this stage that you let out all your emotions after you have gone through denial. At this stage, you tend to blame others for what has happened to your marriage. You may burst out your anger at your friends, family, or your kids. And it is something that you need to avoid. When you are at the edge of expressing your anger, try to express it through writing. You may also try to talk to someone close to you. Beware because this is the hardest phase among all six emotional stages. But to lighten your burden, remember that this anger is temporary. By taking time, you will be able to get through this phase.
When you are at the bargaining stage, you tend to feel helpless. And so, you will try to do anything to save your marriage. It is at this stage where you are most vulnerable. You will try to do immeasurable things such as changing yourself. You will try to compromise on your situation to get your partner back. You tend to be hopeful at his stage, and this can prolong your grieving process. Because you are relying too much on false hopes. To overcome this stage, you need to realize that you do not have full control of your partner’s feelings and emotions. You need to learn to dwell on your future situation and quit thinking about the past.
Among the six emotional stages of divorce, the depression stage is the most silent phase. You tend to realize the reality of your situation. You learn to stop blaming your spouse for the divorce. And you start to realize that you will never be able to save your marriage. Though it is the most silent phase, it is also the hardest. You might feel as if there is no life left for you to live. You would dwell in extreme sadness and loneliness. You won’t find time and energy to do things you used to do. Getting out of a depressive state might be difficult. But you have to remind yourself that everything you are feeling is temporary.
Talking to someone or your therapist will be helpful to help you get through your depression. Try to let out your emotions to your family or friends. As much as possible stop isolating yourself from the world. There are people who are willing to help you cope with your situation. If talking to someone isn’t your thing for a moment, try to write your emotions in a journal. You can start to communicate with people when you are ready.
This is the brightest state among the six emotional stages of divorce. At this phase, you learn to accept the fact that your marriage has ended. You started to see a ray of light from your situation. You start to accept that what happened is now part of your past. You start to plan for your future and you begin to start anew.
Getting through divorce is indeed difficult for both partners, especially to the one being left behind. If you are not aware of your own emotions, you will have a hard time controlling them. Your emotions, when mismanaged, may take control of you. And this can further worsen your situation. But after knowing the six emotional stages of divorce, you may get your way out of divorce without difficulties.
And if you need help with your divorce, visit our website, The Divorce Lawyer Malaysia, for divorce law consultation at https://www.thedivorcelawyermalaysia.com. You can also contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org.